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Divorced and Thriving: How to Break the Stigma Around Second Chances

  Let’s be honest; nobody walks down the aisle thinking they’ll one day be divorced. You plan the wedding, dream of forever, and hope love will always be enough. Unfortunately, it isn’t always so. And when it all falls apart, society often makes it worse. Especially here in Nigeria, where aunties at every family gathering suddenly become relationship counsellors, whispering things like, “What happened?” or “You’ll find someone soon, by God’s grace.” As if your worth expired with your marriage . Now, here’s the truth: divorce isn’t the end of your story. It’s a chapter; a painful one, yes, but also powerful. It can be the beginning of rediscovery, healing, and even thriving. So, let’s talk about breaking the stigma and embracing second chances in love, in life, and in yourself. 1. The Stigma Is Real, But It’s Also Outdated: In our culture, divorce is still whispered about like a scandal. People say “she’s divorced” in hushed tones, as if it’s a crime. Men face judgment too, t...
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Ladies Only: How to Build a Self-Care Routine That Actually Sticks

 

African lady applying lotion on her face

First of all, self-care is more than a luxury — it’s a necessity. Yet, many women struggle to build a self-care routine that truly sticks.

Between work, family, and social commitments, it’s easy to put your needs on the back burner. But self-care isn’t selfish. Rather, it’s the foundation for a healthier, happier you.

Here are some useful tips on how to create a self-care routine that becomes a non-negotiable part of your life.


1. Define What Self-Care Means to You: Self-care looks different for everyone. Some women find joy in a spa day, while others recharge through exercise, journaling, or quiet time with a book. Start by asking yourself: What makes me feel relaxed, recharged, and happy? List activities that bring you peace and fulfillment. This will help you personalize your self-care routine to suit your needs.

Young woman having spa day at home


2. Start Small and Be Realistic: Many women make the mistake of setting an ambitious self-care routine that quickly feels overwhelming. Instead of trying to overhaul your entire life overnight, start with small, manageable steps. For example, if you want to practice mindfulness, begin with five minutes of meditation instead of committing to an hour. Gradually build on your habits so they become sustainable.

African woman applying face serum


3. Create a Schedule and Stick to It: Consistency is key to making self-care a habit. Treat your self-care activities like important appointments, because they are. Whether it’s a morning skincare routine, a weekly workout session at the gym, or 15 minutes of reading before bed. Schedule these activities into your calendar and honour them just as you would any other commitment.

Young woman reading a book


4. Set Boundaries and Say No: One of the biggest barriers to self-care is over commitment. Many women feel guilty saying no, but protecting your time and energy is essential. Learn to set boundaries with work, family, and friends so you can carve out space for yourself. Remember, when you take care of yourself, you’re better able to show up for others.

Young woman holding a mobile phone


5. Include Self-Care into Everyday Life: Not all self-care has to be time-consuming or extravagant. Small daily actions can make a big difference. Here are some simple ways to integrate self-care into your routine:

• Hydrate and nourish your body with healthy meals and plenty of water.

• Move your body through exercise, dancing, or a short walk.

• Unplug from screens and enjoy quiet time.

• Practice gratitude by writing down three things you’re thankful for.

• Pamper yourself with a skincare routine or a warm bath.

African lady moisturising her skin


6. Find an Accountability Partner: It’s easier to stick to a routine when you have support. Find a friend, family member, or online community that encourages your self-care journey. Check in regularly, share your progress, and keep each other motivated.

Beautiful African women with melanated skin



7. Be Kind to Yourself: Some days, life gets in the way, and that’s okay. If you miss a self-care session, don’t beat yourself up. The key is to get back on track without guilt. Self-care is about progress, not perfection.

African lady with shopping bags



Building a self-care routine that sticks requires commitment, but the benefits are worth it. When you prioritize yourself, you’ll feel more energized, balanced, and fulfilled.

Start small, be consistent, and remember — you deserve it!
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