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Forgive and Forget: How to Overcome Resenting Your Ex After a Painful Breakup

  Let’s be honest for a second: resenting your ex can feel justified. They hurt you and disappointed you. They broke promises, crossed boundaries, or turned into someone you barely recognise. So yes, your anger makes sense, and no, you’re not dramatic. You’re just human. However, here’s the uncomfortable truth we don’t talk about enough. Holding onto resentment is exhausting. It keeps you emotionally tied to someone who no longer deserves that level of access to your heart. While resentment feels like protection at first, over time it quietly becomes a prison. So if you’re tired of replaying old arguments in your head, stalking their socials “by accident,” or feeling your mood shift whenever their name comes up, this is for you. Think of this as a mini therapy session: no judgement, just honesty and healing. First, Let’s Name the Pain (Not Minimise It) Before anyone tells you to “forgive and forget,” let’s clear something up first. Forgiveness is not pretending it didn’t hurt. It...

Skinny to Thick: 5 Healthy Weight Gain Foods You Should Try Out

 

A lady holding measuring tape (File photo)

For as long as I can remember, the internet has been obsessed with weight loss. Keto this. Calorie deficit that. Flat tummy teas everywhere. But what happens when you’re on the other side of the conversation?

What happens when you’re skinny, not by choice, and quietly wishing you could gain weight?

For years, I was that person. Very skinny, and somehow, that made me everybody’s business. When I said I wanted to gain weight, I was told I was “ungrateful” because people were spending serious money to look like me while I was busy complaining about being skinny. Other times, the comments were even worse: jokes about me looking anorexic, constant teasing, unsolicited advice, and laughter. It was frustrating. Honestly, it made me keep quiet.

Wanting to gain weight felt like a taboo. Something you shouldn’t say out loud. So, in this post, let’s talk about it properly, kindly, and without shame.

This post is for anyone who is underweight, naturally slim, or struggling to add healthy weight and muscle. You are not weird. You are not ungrateful. And no, you’re not “doing too much” for wanting to feel stronger, healthier, and more confident in your body.

A slim lady (File photo)


Why Healthy Weight Gain Matters

Just like being overweight can come with health challenges, being underweight can also affect your energy levels, immunity, hormones, and overall wellbeing. For many people, gaining weight isn’t about aesthetics. It’s about feeling less tired, improving appetite, building strength, or simply feeling comfortable in their own skin.

Also, healthy weight gain is not about stuffing yourself with junk food and hoping for the best. It’s about nourishment, balance, and consistency.

Let’s get into five healthy weight gain foods that actually help, without damaging your health.


1. Healthy Fats (Avocados, Olive Oil, Nuts): If you’re trying to gain weight, healthy fats are your best friends. They’re calorie-dense, nourishing, and great for your heart and hormones.

Think avocados, olive oil, groundnuts, almonds, cashews, and peanut butter (the natural kind, not the sugar-loaded one). You can add them to smoothies, drizzle olive oil over meals, or snack on nuts during the day. Small portions, big impact. It’s all about consistency.

Healthy fats (Mashed)


2. Complex Carbohydrates (Rice, Yam, Potatoes, Oats): Carbs have been unfairly demonised, but if you’re underweight, they are essential. Complex carbohydrates provide sustained energy and support healthy weight gain.

Brown rice, white rice, sweet potatoes, yam, plantain, oats, and whole-grain bread are all solid options. And yes, jollof rice still counts. Balance is the key, not punishment.


3. Protein-Rich Foods (Eggs, Fish, Chicken, Beans): Protein helps you build muscle, not just weight. Without it, you may gain fat but still feel weak or tired.

Eggs, chicken, turkey, fish, beans, lentils, yoghurt, and milk are excellent choices. If you work out (even lightly), protein becomes even more important. No gym pressure. Just start where you are. Slow and steady wins the race.

Protein-Rich Foods (Verywell Health)


4. Smoothies and Liquid Calories: If eating large portions feels overwhelming, smoothies can save your life. They’re easier to consume and allow you to pack in calories without forcing food down your throat.

A simple combo: banana, peanut butter, milk, oats, and a bit of honey. You can customise it with dates, cocoa powder, or protein powder if needed. Go with the combo that works for you.


5. Dairy and Dairy Alternatives: Full-fat milk, yoghurt, cheese, and dairy alternatives like soy milk can support weight gain while providing calcium and protein.

Add yoghurt to your meals, drink milk with breakfast, or blend it into smoothies. These small additions add up over time. Consistency beats perfection every single time.

Dairy and Dairy Alternatives (Agriland UK)


Let’s Remove the Shame

One thing I wish someone had told me earlier is this: your body goals are valid, even if they don’t fit the mainstream narrative.

Skinny people are allowed to want more weight. We’re allowed to talk about it. We’re allowed to seek help without being mocked.

Your journey doesn’t have to be loud, but it shouldn’t be hidden in shame either. Healthy weight gain takes time, patience, and kindness towards yourself. Some days will be frustrating. Some comments will sting. But your health and confidence are worth it.

So if you’re on a “skinny to thick” journey: physically, emotionally, or mentally, just know you’re not alone. No pressure. No ridicule. Just progress.

And honestly? You’re doing just fine. 💛

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