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Divorced and Thriving: How to Break the Stigma Around Second Chances

  Let’s be honest; nobody walks down the aisle thinking they’ll one day be divorced. You plan the wedding, dream of forever, and hope love will always be enough. Unfortunately, it isn’t always so. And when it all falls apart, society often makes it worse. Especially here in Nigeria, where aunties at every family gathering suddenly become relationship counsellors, whispering things like, “What happened?” or “You’ll find someone soon, by God’s grace.” As if your worth expired with your marriage . Now, here’s the truth: divorce isn’t the end of your story. It’s a chapter; a painful one, yes, but also powerful. It can be the beginning of rediscovery, healing, and even thriving. So, let’s talk about breaking the stigma and embracing second chances in love, in life, and in yourself. 1. The Stigma Is Real, But It’s Also Outdated: In our culture, divorce is still whispered about like a scandal. People say “she’s divorced” in hushed tones, as if it’s a crime. Men face judgment too, t...
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Parenting: 6 Positive Discipline Techniques That Actually Work

 

A happy family

Discipline is an essential part of parenting, but it doesn’t have to involve yelling, threats, or harsh punishments.

Positive discipline focuses on teaching children appropriate behaviour in a respectful and constructive way.

Here are 6 positive discipline techniques that actually work:


1. Set Clear Expectations: Children thrive on structure and predictability. Clearly communicate rules and expectations, so they understand what is acceptable and what isn’t. Use simple language and reinforce rules consistently to help them internalize good behaviour.

Family at home


2. Use Positive Reinforcement: Rather than focusing solely on misbehaviour, acknowledge and reward good behaviour. Praise, encouragement, and small incentives can reinforce positive actions and help children feel motivated to repeat them.


3. Practice Active Listening: Children need to feel heard and understood. When they act out, take the time to listen to their feelings and concerns. Active listening not only strengthens your bond but also helps you address the root cause of misbehaviour effectively.


4. Offer Choices: Giving children choices empowers them and reduces power struggles. Instead of issuing commands, offer two acceptable options. For example, “Would you like to brush your teeth first or put on your pyjamas?” This approach fosters independence and cooperation.

Family eating together


5. Implement Logical Consequences: Natural and logical consequences help children understand the impact of their actions. If a child refuses to put away toys, a logical consequence might be that they lose access to those toys for a short period. This approach teaches responsibility without shaming or punishment.


6. Model Appropriate Behaviour: Children learn by observing their parents. Demonstrate patience, kindness, and problem-solving skills in your daily interactions. When they see you handling conflicts calmly, they are more likely to mimic that behaviour in their own situations.

Young African family


Positive discipline isn’t about being permissive; it’s about teaching, guiding, and nurturing your child in a way that builds their confidence and emotional intelligence.

By using these techniques consistently, you can foster a respectful and loving parent-child relationship while encouraging good behaviour.

What positive discipline strategies work best for you? Share your experiences in the comments.

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