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Divorced and Thriving: How to Break the Stigma Around Second Chances

  Let’s be honest; nobody walks down the aisle thinking they’ll one day be divorced. You plan the wedding, dream of forever, and hope love will always be enough. Unfortunately, it isn’t always so. And when it all falls apart, society often makes it worse. Especially here in Nigeria, where aunties at every family gathering suddenly become relationship counsellors, whispering things like, “What happened?” or “You’ll find someone soon, by God’s grace.” As if your worth expired with your marriage . Now, here’s the truth: divorce isn’t the end of your story. It’s a chapter; a painful one, yes, but also powerful. It can be the beginning of rediscovery, healing, and even thriving. So, let’s talk about breaking the stigma and embracing second chances in love, in life, and in yourself. 1. The Stigma Is Real, But It’s Also Outdated: In our culture, divorce is still whispered about like a scandal. People say “she’s divorced” in hushed tones, as if it’s a crime. Men face judgment too, t...

Be Selfish: 10 Reasons Why You Should Prioritize Self-Care

 

Happy African lady

Recently,  the word, "selfish" has become a bit of a dirty word. We’re conditioned to think that taking time for ourselves is selfish or indulgent, when in reality, self-care is essential for a balanced, healthy life.

Let’s shift that mindset a little. Being “selfish” in a healthy way is a necessity, not a luxury.

Here are 10 reasons why prioritizing self-care is one of the best things you can do for yourself (and everyone else around you).

1. Improved Mental Health: When you take time to care for yourself, you’re directly supporting your mental health. Stress and anxiety can build up if you’re constantly on the go without a break. Prioritizing self-care helps you decompress, boosts your mood, and reduces the risk of mental burnout.

Happy lady relaxing in a bathtub


2. Better Physical Health: Self-care isn’t just about mental relaxation; it includes physical care too. Eating well, getting enough sleep, and incorporating exercise into your routine are all aspects of self-care that can prevent physical health issues. When you’re in good health, you’re also more equipped to handle the demands of everyday life.

3. Increased Productivity: It’s a common misconception that taking time off to rest or relax makes you less productive. In fact, regularly recharging helps you work more effectively. Studies show that people who take breaks and prioritize self-care are more focused and productive when they’re back at work.

4. Enhanced Creativity: Self-care can make a significant difference if you work in a creative field or just enjoy creative activities. Stepping back allows your mind to wander and sparks fresh ideas. By nurturing yourself, you make space for inspiration, leading to better creative flow and innovation.

African lady painting outdoors

5. Strengthened Relationships: When you’re running on empty, it’s hard to be fully present with others. Taking time for self-care enables you to show up as your best self in relationships. You’ll find that you’re more patient, attentive, and compassionate when you’ve taken care of your own needs first.

6. Greater Self-Awareness: Self-care often includes introspective activities like journaling, meditating, or spending time alone. These moments allow you to get to know yourself better, understand what truly makes you happy, and identify what you need to thrive. Self-awareness is the first step to a more fulfilling life.

7. Reduced Feelings of Resentment: When we don’t prioritize ourselves, it’s easy to start feeling resentful toward others. Whether it’s work, family, or friends, giving all of your energy away without taking time for yourself can lead to bitterness. Self-care helps you set boundaries and prevents these negative feelings from building up.

Unhappy  couple

8. Increased Resilience: Life is full of ups and downs, and self-care can build your ability to bounce back from setbacks. When you prioritize your well-being, you’re better equipped to handle stress, setbacks, and life’s inevitable challenges with a calm, positive mindset.

9. Boosted Confidence: Taking care of yourself is an act of self-love. When you make self-care a priority, you’re sending a message to yourself that you are worth the time and effort. This boosts self-esteem and confidence, empowering you to face the world with greater self-assurance.

10. Positive Ripple Effect on Others: Ironically, being “selfish” and prioritizing your own needs benefits those around you. When you take care of yourself, you’re in a better position to support and uplift others. Your positive energy and balanced mood can create a healthier environment for everyone.

Happy  couple

It’s time to let go of the guilt around self-care. Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish; it’s essential.

When you fill your own cup, you have more to give, not less. So go ahead — be “selfish” and prioritize your well-being. You’ll not only transform your own life but also positively impact everyone around you.

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